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Mike Gordan

Week 2 Pick 'ems 2018-2019

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Time for Week 2, everybody!  Here are this week's games:

 

Baltimore Ravens @ Cincinnati Bengals
Carolina Panthers @ Atlanta Falcons
Los Angeles Chargers @ Buffalo Bills
Minnesota Vikings @ Green Bay Packers
Houston Texans @ Tennessee Titans
Cleveland Browns @ New Orleans Saints
Miami Dolphins @ New York Jets
Kansas City Chiefs @ Pittsburgh Steelers
Philadelphia Eagles @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Indianapolis Colts @ Washington Redskins
Arizona Cardinals @ Los Angeles Rams
Detroit Lions @ San Francisco 49ers
Oakland Raiders @ Denver Broncos
New England Patriots @ Jacksonville Jaguars
New York Giants @ Dallas Cowboys
Seattle Seahawks @ Chicago Bears

 

Make your picks!  Here's mine!

 

Ravens, Panthers, Chargers, Packers, Texans, Saints, Jets, Chiefs, Eagles, Redskins, Rams, 49ers, Broncos, Patriots, Giants, and Bears.

 

Survival pick for this week would have to be the Saints or 49ers.  A lot of tossup games this week as well.  Though the biggest question mark is the Packers.  If Aaron Rodgers is ruled out for the week, I'm gonna change my pick to the Vikings.

 

Edit:  I changed one of my picks.  Instead of thinking the Falcons will win, I am now leaning more towards Carolina.  Hopefully, I don't regret that pick.  And since Aaron Rodgers is back out on the practice field, I am still leaning more towards Green Bay.  But if he ends up getting ruled out tomorrow, I'm gonna change my pick to Minnesota.  Everything else will be left as is.

Edited by Mike Gordan

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Before we begin shitposting, a moment of silence for those whose lives were lost 17 years ago today.

 

 

 

 

 

This week's gonna be a real pain in my tails with these match-ups. *unnecessary music because I'm a blatant UrinatingTree ripoff*

 

Baltimore Ravens @ Cincinnati Bengals - With the Ravens riding high off an ass whooping of the Bills, I expect them to pull off the win here.  Cincinnati might be able to pull it off via bullshit magic or cheap shots, but I see the Ravens winning this one.

 

Carolina Panthers @ Atlanta Falcons - Offense vs Offense.  Toss up 1 of 2 used here.  No damn idea who wins.

 

Los Angeles Chargers @ Buffalo Bills - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ha.. ha.... ha... phew. Chargers by infinity.


Minnesota Vikings @ Green Bay Packers - I really, really, REALLY want the Vikings to win, but there's always Rodgers.  I'll go with the Vikings here, but it's very close.  (PLEASE RODGERS NOT THE BELT AGAIN, PLEASE NO AGGGHHHHHHH)


Houston Texans @ Tennessee Titans - Shitshow on Turf 2: Electric Memealoo.  Texans win due to Marcus Mariota being a less effective QB than a sack of potatoes.


Cleveland Browns @ New Orleans Saints - I want to go with the Browns, but it's just not possible yet.  I'll pick them later on, but against the Saints, it'll be a constant uphill battle.  Saints win.


Miami Dolphins @ New York Jets - Miami may have won last week but Sam Darnold apparently transcended to the Jets version of Jesus (Jetsus?).  Jets win.


Kansas City Chiefs @ Pittsburgh Steelers - Pittsburgh plays down to their opponents again and get slaughtered by the Chiefs.


Philadelphia Eagles @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers - Tampa bay shocked everyone last week by dunking the Saints, but I'm assuming that game was a fluke.  I'll pick against the Bucs until they prove they're the real deal.


Indianapolis Colts @ Washington Redskins - Why: Part 2.  Washington wins in a slow, painful to watch game.


Arizona Cardinals @ Los Angeles Rams - Rams win.  Arizona doesn't have enough weapons to handle both sides of the Rams' attack.  Also Bradford tears his ACL for real this game.


Detroit Lions @ San Francisco 49ers - Detroit got the shit beaten out of them as much as the city they reside in has. Stafford has to rebound here or the Lions are in major trouble.  San Fran beats out the Lions here by about a TD.


Oakland Raiders @ Denver Broncos - Even the Broncos can beat that sorry ass peewee league defense the Raiders have.  Broncos by 14.


New England Patriots @ Jacksonville Jaguars - "Tails cops out 2018": Another toss up here.  Both teams are so good it's impossible to choose who wins.


New York Giants @ Dallas Cowboys - Cowboys will put up a decent fight here, but I can see the Giants squeaking out a win due to actually having a pass offense.  Saquon vs Zeke should be a fun storyline.


Seattle Seahawks @ Chicago Bears - Russel Wilson gets murdered by the Bears' defense (but prolly comes back because why not).  Bears should win, but with what happened last week, that's far from a guarantee.

 

I'm suprised I went 8-8 as a complete scrub to this, but this is where it starts counting.  It's time to go full Browns and go 0-14 or 0-16 with my predictions.

Edited by Miles Prower

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Baltimore Ravens @ Cincinnati Bengals -> After an impressive win by Cincinnati and an not so impressive blowout from the Ravens, this one will be evenly matched i think. Ravens will win.
Carolina Panthers @ Atlanta Falcons -> After a heartbreaking loss by the Falcons to the Eagles, they may recover here as Carolina has lost Greg Olsen for some time. Falcons over Panthers.
Los Angeles Chargers @ Buffalo Bills -> Disastrous showing by the Bills last week plus the Chargers nearly came back against KC. Chargers over Bills.
Minnesota Vikings @ Green Bay Packers -> after a miraculous win against the Bears, the Packers face the Vikings. Kirk Cousins looked impressive in his Vikes debut, so Vikes over Packers
Houston Texans @ Tennessee Titans -> Both teams started out slow and lost to the Patriots and Phins respectively. Gonna pick Titans over Texans.
Cleveland Browns @ New Orleans Saints -> After a rather poor showing against Tampa Bay, i think New Orleans may recover here. Browns couldn't get it done against Pitt, resulting in a tie. Saints over Browns
Miami Dolphins @ New York Jets -> After a wild blowout against the Lions, the Jets look like a decent team. But Miami seems to have improved a little, as  well. Gonna pick the Jets.
Kansas City Chiefs @ Pittsburgh Steelers -> Mahomes and Hill looked fantastic against the Chargers. They need to work in Hunt and Kelce more. Steelers couldn't beat Cleveland either, tying with them. Gonna go with KC.
Philadelphia Eagles @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers -> After an impressive win over NO and a good performance from Fitzpatrick, i think TB may take it to Philly. Though, it depends on which Foles we get.  TB over Philly
Indianapolis Colts @ Washington Redskins -> First off, congratulations to Adrian Peterson for 100 career TDs. Now, Andrew Luck is back to full health, so i think Indy may upset Washington. Alex Smith looked pretty decent as well. Indy over Washington
Arizona Cardinals @ Los Angeles Rams -> After dominating the Raiders, i look for the Rams to ram it in against Arizona. Cardinals may have a decent shot, if they don't let Gurley run all over them.  Rams will pluck the Cardinals.
Detroit Lions @ San Francisco 49ers -> After a disastrous showing against the Jets, i suspect Detroit will do no better against the 49ers. I think Garoppolo will do better this time around. SF over Detroit
Oakland Raiders @ Denver Broncos -> Keenum vs Carr. I think Oakland will eke out a win, but not by much.
New England Patriots @ Jacksonville Jaguars -> Brady vs Bortles. Ramsey vs Gronk. This will be a game for the ages for one team. Jacksonville over NE.
New York Giants @ Dallas Cowboys -> Cowboys will squeak by the Giants. Age is slowly but surely catching up to Eli Manning.
Seattle Seahawks @ Chicago Bears -> I look for Chicago to recover once Khalil Mack gets in the swing of things. Nagy needs to improve on the playcalling. Meanwhile in Seattle, Pete Carroll needs to fix his defense. Bears over Seattle.

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Baltimore Ravens @ Cincinnati Bengals
Carolina Panthers @ Atlanta Falcons
Los Angeles Chargers @ Buffalo Bills
Minnesota Vikings @ Green Bay Packers
Houston Texans @ Tennessee Titans
Cleveland Browns @ New Orleans Saints
Miami Dolphins @ New York Jets
Kansas City Chiefs @ Pittsburgh Steelers
Philadelphia Eagles @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Indianapolis Colts @ Washington Redskins
Arizona Cardinals @ Los Angeles Rams
Detroit Lions @ San Francisco 49ers
Oakland Raiders @ Denver Broncos
New England Patriots @ Jacksonville Jaguars
New York Giants @ Dallas Cowboys
Seattle Seahawks @ Chicago Bears

 

that_s_nitpicky_by_dinosaursaremyhero-dc

 

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Cincinnati Bengals
Atlanta Falcons
Los Angeles Chargers
Minnesota Vikings
Tennessee Titans
New Orleans Saints
New York Jets
Pittsburgh Steelers
Philadelphia Eagles
Washington Redskins
Los Angeles Rams
San Francisco 49ers
Denver Broncos
Jacksonville Jaguars
Dallas Cowboys
Chicago Bears

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Baltimore Ravens @ Cincinnati Bengals                   Basically a pickem in which case I'll take the home team. 
Carolina Panthers @ Atlanta Falcons                        Atl lost two key defenders lsat game which make me a bit nervous but they are at home. 
Los Angeles Chargers @ Buffalo Bills                       Chargers have a lot of key guys out but the Bills look like they will be a dumpster fire all season.  
Minnesota Vikings @ Green Bay Packers                 Not sure a hobbled Rodgers can deal with this beastly defense even at home. No Rodgers = no chance. Cousins makes this team even more lethal than last year.
Houston Texans @ Tennessee Titans                       No clue what to make of this game. I kind of want to switch to HOU but will leave it like this for now. 
Cleveland Browns @ New Orleans Saints                Brees and pals can't afford to lose this one at home. 
Miami Dolphins @ New York Jets                             Another one where I have no clue. Gotta dig into this a bit more.
Kansas City Chiefs @ Pittsburgh Steelers               KC's weapons are scary this should be a good one but I'll lean with the home team. 
Philadelphia Eagles @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers      Gotta think about this since desean jackson may be out for this one. Battle of the backup QB's   
Indianapolis Colts @ Washington Redskins            Too much talent on Washington. 
Arizona Cardinals @ Los Angeles Rams                  Could be closer than the spread but rams also have too much talent.
Detroit Lions @ San Francisco 49ers                        Both teams likely better than their week 1 games. Gotta take my boys at home. 
Oakland Raiders @ Denver Broncos                          Oak should be a dumpster fire all season. Can't imagine taking them on the road all season.
New England Patriots @ Jacksonville Jaguars,      NE leads all time series 11-1. 
New York Giants @ Dallas Cowboys                         I think DAL O-line is the difference in this one even though their lack of weaponry at the WR  is concerning.             
Seattle Seahawks @ Chicago Bears                         Den front was too much for SEA last week and CHI likely too much for them this week.  No baldwin will hurt. 

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@manYo720

@BigCat71

 

Waiting for your remaining Week 2 picks as well.  I am patient, but I wish to give you guys a heads up.

 

Also, @Miles Prower don't forget that you have to figure out who's going to win between the Patriots/Jaguars and Panthers/Falcons by tomorrow five minutes before their respective games start.  No "Weekly toss-up" passes here.  Otherwise, they count as lost picks.

Edited by Mike Gordan

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Baltimore Ravens @ Cincinnati Bengals -- CIN (simmerin' succostash: DUB!)
Carolina Panthers @ Atlanta Falcons -- ATL (steve so-co sarkisian)
Los Angeles Chargers @ Buffalo Bills -- LAC (bills, oi, oi!)
Minnesota Vikings @ Green Bay Packers -- GB (curly lambeau fries)
Houston Texans @ Tennessee Titans -- HOU (oilers karma payback)
Cleveland Browns @ New Orleans Saints -- CLE (dawg pound beignets)
Miami Dolphins @ New York Jets -- NYJ (hunter green machine)
Kansas City Chiefs @ Pittsburgh Steelers -- PIT (tomlin gut instincts)
Philadelphia Eagles @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers -- TB (butthole surfers: "florida")
Indianapolis Colts @ Washington Redskins -- IND (ground control: "c-mike")
Arizona Cardinals @ Los Angeles Rams -- LAR (fuck mcvay forever)
Detroit Lions @ San Francisco 49ers -- DET (luke willson roar)
Oakland Raiders @ Denver Broncos -- OAK (beast mode goat)
New England Patriots @ Jacksonville Jaguars -- JAX (jax stacks sacks)
New York Giants @ Dallas Cowboys -- DAL (pickle jerry's brain)
Seattle Seahawks @ Chicago Bears
  -- SEA (dickson your shoulder)

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I thought the home team cin would win (also my afc pick this yr) and I was right.

 

Picking lac, oak, wsh, no, nyj, lar, atl, dal, chi & sf (although I can see maybe det) to win.

 

The others I’m picking I have to admit have a good deal to do with health of key players even if playing: kc, mn, tb, hou & ne.

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Okay, so TecmoSuperFan, bruddog, and Knobbe share the Gold at 11-5 for the week.

 

BigCat71 is distant fourth at 9-7.

 

gojiphen malor and manYO720 share fifth place at 8-8.

 

And myself and Miles Prower take up the rear at 7-9.

 

Though honestly, Miles Prower probably had a chance to potentially place in fourth or fifth place had he settled on a pick between the Panthers and Falcons, as well as the Patriots and Jaguars.  I probably would have hit 8-8 had I not changed my pick last minute against the Falcons.

 

Oh, well!  Stay tuned!  I'm about to open my Week 3 Pick 'ems!

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  • Similar Content

    • By Mike Gordan
      Week 2's now in the books.  Now it's time to pick the Week 3 games.  I'm gonna follow schedule from Tecmonster's 2018-2019 rom from now on, so here's what I've got:
       
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      Green Bay Packers @ Washington Redskins
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      San Francisco 49ers @ Kansas City Chiefs
      Los Angeles Chargers @ Los Angeles Rams
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      Chicago Bears @ Arizona Cardinals
      New England Patriots @ Detroit Lions
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      So come on in!
       
      @TecmoSuperFan
      @bruddog
      @gojiphen malor
      @Knobbe
      @BigCat71
      @manYo720
      @Miles Prower
       
      Also, for future reference, if you don't specify who's going to win by game time, it counts as a loss against you.  If you honestly cannot bring yourself to guess right away, you have until the games start to come up with a winner.  Or you can be the gutsy one and call a tie.
       
      Anyways, I'll make my picks later.  I need to think about my choices before I settle on anything concrete.
    • By Mike Gordan
      I'm going to simply keep track of everybody's scores manually.  Each person has until five minutes before the game starts to put their Pick'ems in.  And I'll be keeping track of the tallies for each week, and for the whole year in general.  As an added bonus, I'll even keep track of how many times somebody wins a particular week.  But with the highest tally after the Super Bowl wins.
       
      Two rules!  You got until five games before the game starts to put a pick in.  Otherwise, it will be treated as a non pick.  In addition, every pick must be made in a single comment.  You can discuss things if you want.  But for the sake of keeping track of everybody's choices, all picks--even if you change your mind later on--must be located in the same comment.  Otherwise, it will be treated as a non pick.
       
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      TB @ NO
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      Here are my weekly picks:  Atlanta, Pittsburgh, Cincinnati, Tennessee, Minnesota, New England, New Orleans, Jacksonville, Baltimore, Chargers, Broncos, Cardinals, Panthers, Packers, Lions, and Rams.  My Survivor pick of the week, however, is Pittsburgh over Cleveland (yes, a road team being chosen as the Survivor Pick of the Week; it is the Browns, after all).  And my toughest pick to make was Arizona over Washington.
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