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Maynard_G_Krebs

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did chiefs beat the pats earlier this year?  if they won, did they just get lucky, like the other 4 games they've won?  thanks.

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Well, to be fair, if the deck is indeed stacked against Tom Brady in winning a League MVP, it will at least give him a shot at winning the Super Bowl this year...because ever since we entered the new Millennium, no League MVP had won the Super Bowl the same year.

 

Oh, yeah!  Something relevant--this Vikings vs. Bears game is shit!  First, they matched up the Seahawks and Colts for Sunday Night Football, and now they're matching the Vikings and the Bears on Monday Night!?  The only real interest is whether or not Trubisky is any good.  To be honest, at least the Bears offense under Trubisky is somewhat productive, unlike the sputtering Vikings offense that can't do anything right.

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13 minutes ago, Mike Gordan said:

Something relevant--this Vikings vs. Bears game is shit! 

 

After I read this comment, I went on NFL.com to check the score.    3-2! 

That's some funny shit.

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26 minutes ago, Bodom said:

 

After I read this comment, I went on NFL.com to check the score.    3-2! 

That's some funny shit.

 

It's worse than the score indicates. Sean McDonough and Jon Gruden spent most of the second quarter hoping that Sam Bradford is done for the night because that dude was shell shocked.

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13 minutes ago, Knobbe said:

 

It's worse than the score indicates. Sean McDonough and Jon Gruden spent most of the second quarter hoping that Sam Bradford is done for the night because that dude was shell shocked.

 

Yeah.............................................

 

But on the bright side, the Vikings just scored a TD!!!!!! YEAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Please kill me. 

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This Vikings celebration that makes you remember that many of these players are children or have the brains of children. I wish I could neg the entire Vikings' franchise. If the Patriots did this, I would roast them. 

 

 

Edited by Maynard_G_Krebs

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Time for some updates on my Week 5 power rankings.  Pardon me because Monday Night football was the only game I actually watched all the way through this week.  Still, here's my power rankings for this week:

 

32.  New York Giants (0-5):  I actually pondered who between the Browns and 49ers were the worst team in football.  The thing is though, those teams still have weapons on offense.  The Giants!?  They lost all their receivers for an extended period of time, and they have no running game to be had.  And considering that Eli Manning has more in common with somebody like Len Dawson or Bob Grease as far as HoF QB's are concerned than somebody like Peyton Manning or Tom Brady (and as such, isn't exactly the kind of guy that can carry a football team on his shoulders), this is a much worst off football club than either of them at this stage of the game.  At least the Browns and the 49ers have the capacity to score points.

 

31.  Cleveland Browns (0-5):  I fiddled between them and the 49ers, but ultimately, from where these two teams are going, at least the 49ers have a couple opportunities in which I can see them winning games.  Mainly because they have another game with the Cardinals as well as a Week 10 matchup with the Giants.  Who do the Browns have that they can reliably defeat!?  They couldn't even beat a Steelers team that plays down to their competition; a Jets team that was devoid of any valid playmakers; or a Colts team that was just as devoid of any real talent.  At least they get a second chance against the Steelers late in the season.  But who can they beat that we can credit for beating!?  It's confounding me because this is supposed to be a vastly improved football team, and they look more interested in finishing where they left off last year.  The question is, will there EVER be an end before the NFL finally dies!?

 

30.  San Francisco 49ers (0-5):  How tragic.  But they're going to win a game or two on accident.  Considering just how close they came to winning only to fail so many times this year, it's going to happen.  They're not 0-16 bad, not even close!

 

29.  Chicago Bears (1-4):  I wanted to move this team a little bit higher because Mitchell Trubisky actually looked like a competent quarterback in spite being a rookie.  Still, they lost a game, and if the Browns taught me anything, this unit needs to prove itself before it can leave the basement...and surely enter the arena of mediocrity.

 

28.  LA Chargers (1-4):  Yay.  The Chargers beaten a Giants team that could sustain itself without any shred of offense remaining.  At least the Raiders game next week is looking more winnable at this point in time.

 

27.  Indianapolis Colts (2-3):  They've beaten the 49ers and the Browns.  They generally dominated those games, but they still had to hold on and only won by a field goal in the end.  Of course, who knows when Andrew Luck will come back, but there is some good news--they're nowhere near as bad as they were when Peyton Manning was out during the 2011 season!

 

26.  Arizona Cardinals (2-3):  This one is slightly sadder because the Cardinals needed to tie up their games in order to force overtime, and they needed miracle finishes to win those games, and against the 49ers and Colts no less!  I'm predicting a miserable regular season finish.

 

25.  Miami Dolphins (2-2):  Well, you sort of derped your way to victory not once, but twice already--against the Chargers and against the Titans.  The Dolphins never really are as good as those two wins could possibly advertise.  Of course, we've been there before last year, but right now, they don't look so good.

 

24.  New York Jets (3-2):  FINE, JETS!  FINE!  YOU DON'T WANT TO TANK!?  GO AHEAD AND KEEP OVERACHIEVING!  DON'T EVEN BOTHER LOOKING FOR A FUTURE STAR QB IN THE FORESSEABLE FUTURE, EITHER!  YOU WIN!  YOU'RE OUT OF THE BASEMENT!  Now go forth, and march onward into mediocrity!

 

23.  Oakland Raiders (2-3):  Their performance against the Ravens at home last week is a reminder; that without Derek Carr, there really isn't much meat on the bones for the Raiders.  There's also this moving to Las Vegas thing that's gonna become an unavoidable distraction.

 

22.  Tennessee Titans (2-3):  Similar case to the Raiders, except Marcus Mariota is poised to return to the lineup at any moment in time since his injurie isn't quite as severe as, say Carr's.  That, and they sort of choked the game away against a really bad Dolphins team.  I was wrong about one thing in particular....it wasn't Brandon Wheedon who started, but Matt Cassel!

 

21.  Minnesota Vikings (3-2):  I got to say, if not for their defensive unit, won would be dumbstruck at just how this team could possibly win.  As such, even in defeat, I had to drop them down a little further than intended.  I smell mediocrity hanging in the air...like the waft of a wet fart.

 

20.  Cincinnati Bengals (2-3):  So following a dreadful 0-2 start that eventually escalated to 0-3, they fired their offensive coordinator, and have finally figured out the complex math equation on how to move the football down the field and actually score touchdowns.  The sad part is, this probably means the Bengals will somehow derp their way to the AFC North division title, and Marvin Lewis would get an extension in the offseason.

 

19.  New Orleans Saints (2-2):  They don't move up or down on the Power Rankings this week.  Why?  It's their bye week!

 

18.  Dallas Cowboys (2-3):  It practically felt a lot like Deja vu!  From their NFC Divisional Round upset against the Packers!  Except you guys were winning throughout most of the game!  AND still lost to an incredibly clutch Aaron Rodgers!

 

17.  Baltimore Ravens (3-2):  So what!?  When I heard Derek Carr went down to injury, I began pilfering from their unconscious bodies!  Metaphorically speaking, of course.  My point was, of course the Ravens were going to defeat the weather fairy somehow!

 

16.  Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-2):  Meh.  Not even worth talking about to be quite honest with you.

 

15.  The Redskins get their bye week.  Again, their rankings as of right now never changes.

 

14.  Houston Texans (2-3):  You lost both core components of your Pass Rush season!?  Well, at least it was against the Chiefs instead of yet another division rival.  Either way, that's brutal!

 

13.  LA Rams (3-2):  The Rams lost narrowly to the Seahawks.  I suppose then it's totally within the realm of reality that the Rams would get their asses handed to them on a silver platter by a QB so dysfunctional  At least they're fun to watch play!

 

12.  Jacksonville Jaguars:  Of course.  They have a ride attraction in the main parkland itself.  Blake Bortles threw for 95 yards and a pic.  Didn't know that was all you needed in order to embarrass the once high-powered Steelers offense!  God, what are they, anyways, and why won't they die!?

 

11.  Buffalo Bills (3-2):  At the very least, I would have at least tolerated the fact that the okay....what was I saying again?  Sorry; I fell asleep.  Oh, yeah!  They lost to the freaking Bungles!

 

10.  Pittsburgh Steelers (3-2):  Big Ben threw for over 300 yards versus Blake Bortles' 95 last Sunday.  Just how on earth did they even lose to the Jaguars anyways!  Oh, yeah!  Big Ben threw a metric ton of interceptions; that's how!  That, and you played down to their perceived trashiness for some reason!  HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH!  You guys are so fucked next week!

 

9.  Seattle Seahawks (3-2):  They won the important matchup against the Rams.  Of course the NFL's Social Justice Warriors had to win a core matchup!

 

8.  Detroit Lions (3-2):  The Lions' drop is escalated by the fact that Matthew Stafford had gotten hurt, and he may very well end up not playing next week.  At the very least, that bit of concern is only going to last for this very week and not the entire rest of the year as well.  As such, the Lions don't fall off a cliff so suddenly. and are still in the top ten.

 

7.  New England Patriots (3-2):  They're still a work in progress, but win the next five games, and the Patriots almost certainly make the playoffs.  Their next opponent?  Um...it's the Jets....you know, I would be the kind of guy that would point out just how much the Patriots ought to be able to win this game easily, but given the way they've been playing so far this year, and considering the way the Jets have been overachieving, a sign of confidence is replied with just one simple statement:  Don't fuck this up, Patriots!

 

6.  Denver Broncos (3-1):  They get the week off being their bye week and whatnot.

 

5.  Green Bay Packers (4-1):  This is Aaron Rodgers single-handedly carrying this team to the top five for the time being.  He was terrific; he was clutch; enough said.

 

4.  Philadelphia Eagles (4-1):  Well, we'll figure out soon enough just how good the Eagles really are.  And given the fact that they have been playing a Panthers squad that nobody gave a chance at anything and are suddenly winning upset after upset after upset, I think it's safe to say they're not quite THAT great.

 

3.  Atlanta Falcons (3-1):  Once again, it's their bye week.  So their ranking is locked into place.

 

2.  Carolina Panthers (4-1):  Probably the second most convincingly solid team in the NFL behind our last remaining unbeaten squad, as they have clobbered the 49ers and beaten the Bills, Patriots, and Lions in contested games.  Not bad.

 

1.  Kansas City Chiefs (5-0):  I've already spoken of this team enough.  Except now, I'm convinced they'll remain undefeated after the next week as well.  It' hard to imagine very many teams even coming close to defeating the Chiefs unless they happen to be their very own division rivals.  But I digress.

 

Now I'm done for the week.  Good night!

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8 hours ago, Maynard_G_Krebs said:

 

This Vikings celebration that makes you remember that many of these players are children or have the brains of children. I wish I could neg the entire Vikings' franchise. If the Patriots did this, I would roast them. 

 

 

 

Are you missing the No Fun League rules? 

Who doesn't love a good game of duck, duck, grey duck?

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1 hour ago, Knobbe said:

 

Are you missing the No Fun League rules? 

Who doesn't love a good game of duck, duck, grey duck?

 

Nothing like the juxtaposition of men and man-children giving each other long-term health ramifications from playing a violent sport, by performing ridiculous children's game celebrations in the end zone.

Edited by Maynard_G_Krebs

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there's a word (that I am not allowed use anymore) that describes the duck goose celebration.  it begins with G and ends with Y.

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2 minutes ago, Maynard_G_Krebs said:

 

Nothing like the juxtaposition of grown ass men giving each other long-term health ramifications from playing a violent sport, by performing ridiculous children's game celebrations in the end zone.

 

I don't think they had the time to pull of that scene from Hamlet they were mulling over.

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I think I'd try to bring back the Charleston if I was performing a touchdown celebration. Sure Chad Johnson and Victor Cruz were showboating...but they were also educating. 

charleston_gif.gif

 

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3 minutes ago, gojiphen malor said:

Adrian Peterson Traded to Cardinals.

 

This seems like a lot better fit...which you could say about most teams that aren't the Saints. Whomever AP has as an agent is dumb.

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